Weekly Horoscopes, March 23-29: Slow Burn

With Venus and Mercury retrograde in the fiery sign of Aries, you might feel like crawling under the bed for the next few weeks, but there's a huge plot twist coming this week.

The Sun has entered the sign of Aries, which has two planets in retrograde: Venus and Mercury. The Sun will spotlight ways of thinking and loving that need an upgrade. By the way, I’ve barely managed to carve out the time to write this horoscope because I’m getting slammed with clients asking for tarot and astrology readings about their employment or love life. The best way I can describe it is that everyone’s first question is, “WTF?”

But there’s a plot twist: Venus and Mercury are heading back into the sign of Pisces, where Saturn and Neptune have been happily living together for over a year. Retrogrades already require introspection and reflection, but when Venus goes back into Pisces on Friday, March 28, and Mercury follows on March 31, they’ll have another pow-wow with Saturn, the planet of responsibility and stability, and Neptune, the planet of dreams and escapism to make sure the I is dotted and the T is crossed in your new solar year. This will be the time to emotionally and cognitively calibrate before Venus and Mercury head back to Aries.

ARIES

Happy Solar Return, Aries. Sorry that the next few weeks will feel like trying to run through a tub of molasses, but you’ve got some emotional closure coming when Venus returns to Pisces. Use this time to channel your frustration into new creative or spiritual pursuits.

TAURUS

You might be in for a cosmic identity crisis with Venus going back and forth between Pisces, your 11th House, and Aries, your 12th House, but it comes down to revisiting your values and boundaries. See your stubbornness as an old, comfy sofa that needs reupholstering.

GEMINI

Your trademark duality will be squared or cubed this week as your cognitive engine goes overdrive. You’ll feel like you’re all over the place. You’ll have so many brilliant ideas, but you can only choose a couple in the future. It’s about finding a new way to be authentic.

CANCER

Your emotional sensitivity will be a superpower instead of Kryptonite this week. Mars, the ruling planet of Aries, will be charging forward even if Aries grinds slowly, but this week will be about establishing new boundaries, not walls. Your philosophical views will bend, not break.

LEO

It’s okay to be vulnerable, mainly since the Sun, your ruling planet, works with two retrograde planets. This week, situations require emotional honesty instead of brute strength. “I’m still figuring it out” might be a usual phrase, but don’t feel you must explain yourself.

VIRGO

Virgos, consider your perfectionism on official hiatus. You want to keep all the plates spinning, but it’s time to let some of them fall. Your relationships will require more karmic realignment instead of logic. This week might feel like an emotional tornado, but you’ll be in the eye of the storm.

LIBRA

With Venus back and forth between Aries and Pisces, your relationships might suffer from whiplash. There will be miscommunication, but use your emotional intelligence and take it in stride. The scales don’t need to be perfectly balanced; it is a matter of determining which side gets more weight.

SCORPIO

You might feel your intuitive superpowers are twice as powerful this week, but don’t go overboard. Now is the time for deeper introspection and committing to a meaningful purpose instead of temporary engagement. Gentle persistence, not forceful determination, is required.

SAGITTARIUS

With Jupiter in Gemini, your relationship zone, you might feel extra optimistic, so it’s best not to run that yellow light; exercise caution. Stay put: old matters regarding home and family may resurface, and you’ll need to do the emotional work instead of taking off to your next destination.

CAPRICORN

This week, you’re a goat climbing up a mudslide; it’s possible but messy, but retrogrades are about getting past the messiness. Your determination will be helpful, too, but it’s best not to rely on practicality to get up that mountain and strive for emotional altitude.

AQUARIUS

Innovative thinking has always been your go-to strategy, but watery trines with Mars (in Cancer) and Saturn (in Pisces) will require emotional intelligence in your financial sector. While detachment is your comfort zone, necessity will nudge you out into deeper emotional waters, and aren’t you the water-bearer after all?

PISCES

Mercury and Venus are returning to your sign for another pool party. Mars, in Cancer, is forming a fluid trine with Saturn in your sign, which means your dreams will find emotionally wise channels for expression, and when Venus returns, there will be some extra charm to go with it.